Ryan is almost two months old and I still feel like I'm trying to get my bearings. Some of that may be due to the fact that I had a few tiny unrealistic expectations. Miniscule, really.
Like I thought losing the baby weight would be no problem. I mean, my body was awesome during pregnancy. My blood sugar got progressively lower as my pregnancy continued. I felt good. I slept well. And until the last few weeks, my blood pressure was beautiful. Oh, and I managed a reasonable weight gain--25 lbs. (At least, that was my gain before being admitted to the hospital. I was pumped full of fluid there so I have no way of knowing what my final gain was before Ryan was born.)
So I assumed people were crazy when they told me it would take some time to lose the weight. I mean, yeah...time. Like, 3 weeks? 4? Surely by the time I returned to my classroom I would be able to button my pants again. After all, I could still slide all of them over my hips and my legs stayed the same size.
De. Lu. Sional.
I have always been a chubby girl. Rotund, even. But at my fattest, the roles on my stomach were always relatively flat. To quote Jen Lancaster, "A pretty fat." I didn't realize when people told me to take loose clothing to hospital what they were actually saying was "You may look four months pregnant for a while. Get used to it."
True to form, I look like I'm getting ready to identify the gender of my next baby. And I'm seriously struggling to keep from beating myself up over all the progress I made last summer in the exercise/weight loss department.
I mean, I wanted this. I wanted a baby more than anything in the world, and I am SO grateful for him. So why I am a little depressed over this development? Because I'm a girl. And there's something in girl code that says, "Oh things are going too well in my life. I have to find something to piss and moan about."
So before I get all look-at-my-baby's-two-month-pictures-and-how-much-he's-grown-and-why-can't-he-stay-a-baby-forever-how-does-time-go-this-fast, I thought I'd get this out of my system.
When people said, "Oh, you totally lose weight breast feeding," I heard, "You might become an international model if he nurses for longer than 10 seconds."
Epic fail, that one.
Even though nursing is supposed to filter most of the sugar out of my body, I still seem to struggle with my lady lumps (and not just the ones producing food). Weird, right? So now I'm back to really limiting sugar in my diet and I'm working toward cutting white flour completely (again).
Actually, that's the upside of this whole story: I found a wagon and I chased it down so I could get on. And that is largely due to the fact that I returned to my school about the time the faculty has logged a joint 400 lb weight loss.
It was like getting a kick in the teeth...but the kind that makes excited because now you can get veneers.
So in the footsteps of my friend, Morgan, who set a goal to walk 100 miles in 50 days, I'm pledging to walk/run 100 miles in the month of June.
Anyone else up for the challenge? Let's hashtag it in twitter: #100inJuneChallenge
What else do you do to get back on the proverbial wagon? I'll take all the advice I can get.