Wednesday, July 3, 2013

The Three Love Languages (OK, there are five, but only three really mattered to me)

At my parents' house, Wednesday was typically called "Wednesday Night Dinner." Our regular crew would sit around the dinner table, eat and banter. And the topics? Well, ladies and gentlemen, that was a deep, deep well. Sometimes my brothers and I would participate in the game we affectionately dubbed Who-Can-Make-Mom-Blush-First. (For those curious souls, my brothers were the regular victors in that game with LilBro taking top prize for making Mom ask what a "Fluffer" did for a living. And before you ask, no, I won't be relaying that conversation here.)

Of course, regular obligations and some rotation in our regular crew have made the original Wednesday Night Dinners a thing of the past.  Now Wednesday Night Dinners take place on Sunday evenings; sometimes they are on Sunday afternoons. (Or Saturday evenings. Or Tuesday evenings. You get the picture.)

One of our more recent topics was love languages.  According to author Gary Chapman, there are five of them:  words of affirmation, acts of service, receiving gifts, quality time and physical touch. 

(Guess which one would be a Fluffer's number one?)

Approximately five seconds into our conversation, everyone was trying to guess everyone else's bottom love language--you know, the one your spouse needs that you could do without.

Don't judge.  All conversations have to start somewhere.

Turns out, guessing is unnecessary because there is a very convenient and telling online quiz here.  (Go ahead.  This post will be here when you finish.)  That discovery led to the quietest dinner I've ever had with those people in my entire life.  People stared at cell phones, clicked and chewed for an half hour.

(I'd like to share everyone's individual results.  I have a great story about Gloria's results and the reactions around the table, but I'm not all about laying everyone's personal business out on the interwebs.)

(Alright.  That's a lie.  OF COURSE I'd share personal business if I thought it would get a laugh.  But some things require a foreknowledge I just can't explain here.)

The results were pretty telling, though.  For instance, I would feel loved if you cleaned my house, brought me a present and then offered to hang out.  I do not, however, need you to tell me you like me or hold my hand.  In fact, I need those things so little, they barely scored on the charts (both with a score of 1).  The top three, however, scored a 10, 9 and 8 respectively.

And this, ladies and gentlemen, is why I appear to have no feelings.

Mystery solved.

Take the quiz and share your interpretation of your results.  I'd love to hear them.

1 comment:

Katie said...

My scores...which I don't think will surprise you...

8 Words of Affirmation
10 Quality Time
6 Receiving Gifts
5 Acts of Service
1 Physical Touch

The whole time I was doing the quiz, I kept thinking I just want people to hang out with me, not touch me.