Voskamp asks, "Doesn't my world also stabilize when I rejoice in Your words?" (One Thousand Gifts Devotional 31).
I'm trying to process those thoughts because I don't want to be flippant about this relationship that often confounds me. I think maybe the difficulty is in the word "stabilize." The first entry on Google says, "Make or become unlikely to give way or overturn." That makes so much sense to me, because my initial feeling about stabilization indicates an "evenness" I never have in difficulty. I'm far too emotional--too up and down to be "even" during chaos. And I've envied people with that kind of demeanor.
But the fact that rejoicing in God may be the very thing that keeps me from "giving way"? Yeah. I get that. In the middle of the darkest days, when I first started praying for God to save us from drowning, I couldn't' see any movement on His part. I prayed in panic daily--sometimes hourly--because I honestly felt like breathing was an impossible task. Looking back, I know that "no response" isn't true. (Though, I only saw Him through this "looking back.") We never overturned. We breathed in water, but did not drown. We walked through the fire, not without scorch marks, but without being burned up.
That description doesn't sound much like rejoicing--simply praying for survival. But isn't acknowledgement of God in itself rejoicing? Isn't it honest and open recognition of who He is? A recognition of the creation in the chaos, to quote L'Engle.
That's how I didn't overturn. I cried. A lot. And I was honest with the One Who Hears.
So I guess my world does stabilize in rejoicing. I'd never thought about it like that.
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