I'm jealous because the Pioneer Woman never writes about blog slumps. Young House Love always has some cool, new project to share with the world. And I? Struggle to write anything interesting, but all I have is the story about how a june bug crawled up my pant leg while I was driving home last night and I had to hold my pant leg with one hand while I tried to fish him out with the other and what hand was I using to steer, you ask? That would be my chin. Because I CAN.NOT.DRIVE.WITH.A.BUG.IN.MY.PANTS. Ew. Gross. Andwhateverexpletiveisappropriateforjunebugscrawlingupyourpants.
Through my slump, though, I've been wondering when it's good or appropriate to toss in the towel. The last few months of my life have been proof that God doesn't ask us to soldier through everything, and I've just been wondering where the line is drawn?
I keep trying to strike this weird balance between hopeful and realistic and one doesn't necessarily support the other--which is a strange balance to navigate. Realism says that some things will never change while hope keeps pointing out all the strange surprises that have infiltrated the lives of others.
I have a good life. Favorite believes it is his job to provide above and beyond for us. I have a beautiful home. (It still doesn't have pictures on the wall. Anyone want to come help hang the pictures? I'm terrified I'm going to ruin the drywall, because I have to rearrange them so many times.) I have plenty of clothes. We eat well, and I have enjoyed cooking. (I wish I didn't enjoy eating nearly as much...) I have a tightly knit family unit that is inclusive and appreciative of the people we've been given. (Even though I'm pretty sure PastorJosh is my dad's new-best-girlfriend...it's an amusing dynamic.)
All of those things are really fantastic things. Things that make a lot of people envious. And I really look like I've been custom planted in the middle of a fantastic garden.
But sometimes I find it difficult to focus on those things. Instead,
* I want to quit writing because it never turns out the way I had envisioned.
* I want to scream, "OK, PCOS, you win. I'll stay fat and it will be Favorite and I and no one else."
* I want to make all of the snarky comments I manage to withhold from regular conversation.
Anyway...
In the near future, I'd like to start a series of guest posts--maybe one a week or so. I've asked BigBro to participate. (He's an engineer, but wait until you read his clean, neat prose.) I'm also open to including anyone else without a blog who has something that may work on A Life in Ordinary (which means the door is pretty open since no topic has been off-limits here).
Email me if you're interested. I'll be in the field shooting the horse so I don't have to get on it again, but I promise to get back to you.
3 comments:
I go through seasons where I want to give up on blogging and have felt many of the same feelings you do. I might let go of it someday, but for now, I am still enjoying it more than not loving it :)
For the record, I find that driving with a june bug in one's pants is perfectly sufficient as a blog topic. Now that's real life.
I understand! If it weren't for this A-to-Z Challenge, who knows when I would have blogged again.
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