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Wednesday, April 4, 2012

They Call Him PORK...

My dog has gotten a little...substantial.  His name is Archimedes, but my dad has recently insisted on calling him Hogamedes or Porkimedes so maybe substantial isn't really the word I'm looking for.

He's gotten tubby.

And I didn't notice because he's also fluffy and I think his tubbiness has happened over the course of a year or so.

When my dad pointed it out, I got all insulted because my dog?  Isn't fat!  He's happy.  Very happy.  And cute.  And fluffy.  And holy-cow-he's-the-size-of-a-bassett-hound.  (Even though he's only supposed to a 20 lb shih tzu.)

I noticed it when I saw him waddling from the back.  Trust me, here.  Waddling is what he does.  He can't even run without his backend sashaying all over the place.

So I started trying to account for his extra girth.

We weren't feeding him extra.  He wasn't getting extra biscuits.  Was Favorite feeding him off the table?

I confronted him and implied that is exactly what was happening.  Favorite informed me that outside of the occasional apple, Porky wasn't getting extras.

Then it hit me.

Favorite dumps our leftover food outside in order to keep our trash from smelling horrific.  When we let our little fluffball outside to do his "business," he was making his way to the dumped food and gladly helping himself.

Needless to say, we are no longer dumping food, and he's being deprived of his 7,000 calorie-a-day diet.

A few biscuits and one scoop of food a day.  That's all he gets now.  He can forage all he wants.

Maybe soon we'll call him Barky again.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Tehehe!
I like your Dad's names for him :) Dads are funny.

Sheena said...

Bahahaha! Oh my goodness, I am laughing so hard! Poor Barky. That's funny, though.

Mindee@ourfrontdoor said...

Sneaky little guy! How funny. :)

Taylor said...

We had a dog who started eating the cat food, unbeknownst to us. He grew quite large. It was unsightly, really. :)